Buddhist Indian
Wedding, Anyone?
What about having an Indian Wedding in a Buddhist Temple?
Here I shared Uvaraani and Jivan Thali Tying ceremony in Sungai Petani, in the
presence of the Sokkai Gakai Dojo Chief. Being the centre chief, Uvaraani and
Jivan had a Buddhist wedding ceremony with a twist.
Thali tying the Indian way
to complete the Buddhist ceremonial rites was performed as agreed by both parents.
For Jivan's mum, to actually see Jivan married in the dojo is a dream come through and
she really planned it so well.
The support shown by the spiritual friends, turning up in full force and
support speaks alot of the organization. They were there to greet and usher the guests.
The Wedding Day
If you are around in the mornings of both wedding houses, you would realized
a tornado had hit it. Everyone was rushing to get everybody ready. Food have to
be served for the groom entourage coming to fetch the bride. At the same time
the bride's brother or the male entourage, leaves the bride residence to invite
the groom to the designated location for the wedding, sometimes a temple or
hall.
Both the bride and the groom then arrive at the designated location for the
wedding proper. Usually the bride arrived first and will be ushered to
another part of the hall.
After the morning ceremonies, the groom and his
entourage will arrive at the wedding hall. This is a very colorful
festive celebration with the drumming and trumpeting of the Nadaswaram as the
groom is paraded to the hall. Then the bride with her cuties (bridesmaids)
led again by the trumpets and drummers of the Nadaswaram blasting away enters
the matrimonial hall.

Chanting the Buddhist Mantras

Jivan and Uvaraani before the Chief

Preparing the Thali blessing tray |

Jivan and Thinakaran during the chanting ceremony

Uvaraani and bridesmaid during chanting of mantras |
The Buddhist matrimony rites
Jivan then takes his place, and sit patiently waiting for his bride to enter.
Followed by Uvaraani. this is an unusual Indian wedding as you don't see the
groom going off to temple to pray or the bride having a change of engagement
sari to wedding sari. Those Indian rituals were omitted so you see both the
couple in full wedding attire ready for the wedding but with a great difference.
All present including the bride and groom kneel in front of the holy altar
and before their dojo chief. A half hour session of chanting mantras concluded
with the Indian relatives passing the "Thali tray" around for the elders to
bless. It was brought back to the chief who now officiated over the Thali tying
ceremony.
As the chanting was going on, I can't helped but remembered the Indian
mantras which translated the seven step and prayed that it is also in the
Buddhist mantras for the newly weds:
|
Ye who have walked with me, become my companion,
whereby I acquire your friendship. We shall remain together – Inseparable.
Let us make a vow together. We shall love, share the same food, share our
strengths, the same tastes. We shall be of one mind. We shall observe the
vows together. I shall be the Sama and you the Rig. I shall be the upper
world and you the earth. I shall be the sukhilam and you the holder.
Together we shall live, beget children and other riches. Come thou, o
sweet worded girl. |
Indian Rites and Thali Tying
The tying of the Thali takes place at exactly the pre-determined auspicious
hour. The bridegroom puts the turmeric thread around the neck of the bride. As
he does so the Nadaswaram is played loud and fast so as to muffle any
inauspicious sounds at the critical hour. The vedic hymn recited by the
bridegroom when he ties the knot is:
|
"I pray to the Almighty that I be blessed with a
long life. I tie this knot around your neck. Oh Sowbhayam, May
providence bestow on you a fulfilling life for a hundred years to come!" |
He then takes the 'Thali' from an elder of the family or the centre chief and
ties the first two knots around the bride's neck. Generally, the groom
ties the first two knots and his sister ties the last one. Turmeric and
'kumkum' are smeared on the 'Thali' and the three knots. The couple
exchange garlands three times. They then get the blessings of the elders. It has
to be noted that ladies must be married not widow, divorce or separated to help
in any wedding function. Sad but true.
Treading on the Grindstone
Holding the bride’s left toe the bridegroom helps her to tread on a
grindstone kept on the right side of a fire. One Indian mantras which we love
says: Mount on this stone, and let thy mind be rock firm, unperturbed by the
trials and tribulations of life. This ritual is symbolic of the solid rock
foundation for the union.

Jivan with the Thali

Helping Jivan to dot his bride forehead

Getting blessing from Jivan parents

Indian Wedding: Getting blessing from Uvaraani Mum |

Jivan ties the Thali

Indian Wedding: Exchanging Malars "flower garlands

Wearing a toe ring for his bride

The newly weds Jivan and Uvaraani
|
Solemnizing the Marriage
Nowadays the registrar of marriage can solemnize the marriage outside the
Marriage Registrar. You first need to report back to the town or district you
are presently staying. For Jivan and Uvaraani case, they went to Kuala Muda
district marriage registry to have the marriage date confirm.
So on the wedding day, the Registrar of Marriage solemnizes the marriage in
the presence of all friends and relatives right in the matrimonial hall. Here
again, they got themselves tied "tighter" into the marriage as they exchange
their marriage vows twice. One with the registrar or Marriage and the other with
the Buddhist Dojo chief.

Jivan signing the Papers

Preparing the Buddhist Marriage Certificate

Indian Wedding: Centre Chief witnessing the signing

Aunt Sarojini and Mohan with the Newly Weds

Mums, the newly weds with the Nadaswaran

Mums blessing the Newly Weds |

Indian Wedding: Uvaraani signing the papers

Registrar of marriage solemnizing the marriage

At last, the marriage certificate in our hands

Indian Wedding: The Indian Maharaja and his bride in Sungai Petani, do you agree? |
As can be observed, we tried to maintain the symbolic Indian
marriage as possible because the time for Jivan to tie the Matrimonial knots
"Thali" must be respected.
There were many other things that can be deleted and omitted
but the timing needs to be observe. Whatever you may say, marriages for the
Chinese and Indians alike are still made in heaven. And you thought you fell
in love and wants to be together?
Well, need an
Wedding Planner, talk to Ganesan, our Indian Wedding planner and
food caterer.
Certain Hindu Translation:
Nadaswaram : Traditional South Indian music ensemble
including the tavil (drum), nadaswaram (a sort of wind instrument) and small
cymbals.
Kolam or Rangoli : Designs made on the floor with rice flour
paste
Sowbhayam : Literally meaning good fortune. It is intended
to be the good fortune of never being widowed.
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